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Limited-Time Offer! Act Now! Operators Standing By! MagiMold�!

Richard Sternberg


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The rogue proteins behind variant CJD, the human form of mad cow disease, have revealed their benign side. Prions, it seems, lie at the heart of a newly discovered form of near-instant evolution that provides life with a third way to adapt to potentially lethal environments. Crucially, it involves neither genetic nor epigenetic changes to DNA.

…In challenging conditions, [Yeast] can instantly churn out hundreds of brand-new and potentially lifesaving proteins from its DNA, all without changing the genes in any way.
(“Prions point to a new style of evolution,” New Scientist, February 16, 2012)

From the makers of preLife Crystals�, Sea-Baboons�, HamWow� — the first shammy that is living pigskin — and OxiGene�, we are proud to introduce…MagiMold�, the Insta-evolving� fungus.
Developed in our labs at PrionTech Corporation, MagiMold� can transform any old batch of yeast into an urbilaterian — the “it” that evolved into all of us, your cat, your goldfish, the fly you just swatted — almost everything. This “it” has a thousand uses — you decide! Just take a teaspoon of baker’s or brewer’s yeast, add the required drops of MagiMold�, shake, and wait. Right before your eyes a new reproducing form will appear that has no traits…so you can accessorize! By applying selection, anything is possible — your schmoo can become a living carpet, a slug-like creature that will take care of an indoor or outdoor bug problem, a sporulating pet that will amuse the neighbors with its playful antics…anything!
MagiMold� works because of prions, special proteins that allow a cell to evolve before its DNA does. Then mutation and selection come into play and…the evolved prion-trait becomes fixed. It’s more than genetic. It’s more than epigenetic. It’s Magi-genetic!
Clients who have used MagiMold� testify to this wonder of nature that’s been harnessed by PrionTech Corporation. Here are just a few of the testimonials we’ve received:

My young son accidentally poured an entire container of MagiMold� into the swimming pool last spring. Within days we had our own backyard aquarium with all kinds of creature-like things swimming about. By the fall, the pool thingies had disappeared…but so did all the weeds and our neighbor’s horrible dog. Thank you MagiMold�!
–Helen B., Lexington SC

As an amateur scientist and young-earth creationist I was skeptical about whether MagiMold� really works. So I ordered some and tried to follow the instructions, but somehow I got it onto my scalp. Having been bald for most my adult life, I was shocked to see that after about a week a new head of hair had grown — well, it kind of looks like hair. I keep it well fed and it grows luxuriantly. MagiMold� you’ve made me a new man!
–Horace W., Penobscot ME

Don’t wait because supplies are running out! If you call within the next five minutes, we will send you not one, but 2 containers of MagiMold�. That’s not all. We will also send you a pair of HamWow� shammies along with our newest product, The Pocket Golfer� — your very own golf course that fits in a pocket. Worth $49.95, you pay only $19.95 + shipping and handling. Call now while supplies last! 555-555-1212.

Richard Sternberg

Senior Fellow, Center for Science and Culture
Richard Sternberg is an evolutionary biologist with interests in the relation between genes and morphological homologies, and the nature of genomic “information.” He holds two Ph.D.'s: one in Biology (Molecular Evolution) from Florida International University and another in Systems Science (Theoretical Biology) from Binghamton University. From 2001-2007, he served as a staff scientist at the National Center for Biotechnology Information, and from 2001-2007 was a Research Associate at the Smithsonian’s National Museum of Natural History. Dr. Sternberg is presently a research scientist at the Biologic Institute, supported by a research fellowship from the Center for Science and Culture at Discovery Institute. He is also a Research Collaborator at the National Museum of Natural History.

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biomimicrybutterfliesDNAevolutionIllustra Mediaintelligent designmetamorphosisNewsprionsyeast