As a “Career Feature,” the science journal Nature offers advice on “How to write a first-class paper.” A panel of six scientists and science writers weighs in, with good pointers including “Keep your message clear,” “State your case with confidence,” “Prune that purple prose,” “Aim for a wide audience,” etc.

No argument so far. But what if you want to write, specifically, a biology paper and — here’s the key — make sure it gets published? Aren’t there special requirements that come into play? You bet there are.

Here is how to guarantee publication of your scientific research article in a biology journal:

1. Introduction: Start by stating confidently that evolution is true.
2. Methods and Results: If (as often happens) some of your results are inconsistent with evolutionary theory, describe them in the most obscure technical language available.
3. Discussion: Make some clever guesses about why some of your data seem to be inconsistent with evolutionary theory. If that doesn’t work, claim that your data expand and enrich our understanding of evolution. (Optional: Insert a disparaging comment about intelligent design.)
4. Conclusion: Evolution is true.

Simple, right? You are welcome. Now get to work!

Photo credit: fancycrave1, via Pixabay.